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Sunday, September 28, 2008

I turn from the light...embracing the darker pleasures.

I drank on the plane and I drank at the airport, waiting on a girl from the office to pick me up. She joined me while we poured a few down and played 'spy' at the airport.

I talked her into stopping for provisions on the way to my apartment. She was drunker than she ought to have been, but it didn't matter to me.

She was the one driving.

After more libations and clumsy, embarrassing sex, I decided to put on a pot of beans. The old fashioned way; slow, simmering, southern goodness.

We both passed out with the beans on the stove.

I came to in a grey world filled with acrid smoke, populated by large angry dude's in space suits. One of whom was slapping the shit out of me before throwing me over his shoulder and carrying me outside.

The San Francisco Fire Department takes a dim view of stupid drunks almost killing themselves with a pot of burning beans.

She was wearing a blanket, playing cutesy with a fireman while I watched, stark naked- thank you very much- to yellowish smoke billowing from my now burning apartment.

The apartment manager had been summoned and I could imagine she was not going to be happy about this.

She was still mad from two weeks ago when I carpeted the kitchen.

My feet were cold.

No comments:

My new disclaimer...yeah I know.

Okay, the old disclaimer was tired. The ideas were outdated and keeping me stuck in a place I don't want to be now for something more refreshing.

I have recently changed my views regarding women. Seems I had some issues with the fairer sex due to past pain and self- centered fear. (Yes...duh applies.)

I'm done with that.

Being in recovery has helped me change my entire life, perceptions and attitudes. I cannot change my history but I can change my today and my future.

I recently realized that the women I know in recovery are some of the strongest, bravest, most gentle and kind teachers I have ever had. You exemplify integrity and spiritual growth, and I hope you know who you are.

Some may know of my past marital and relationship history and been a participant in them as well. It's past and that's where it the past.

I own my part in those failures but claim no more responsibility in any misery you may be experiencing. I am sorry, but it's time to get off the cross. We need the wood.

Thank you all...